My fight to financially untangle myself from my Ex.
In February 2022 I purchased a condo in Mexico. Trash and I were to go in on it 50/50. Purchase price was $250,000. AT the ver last minute, the day before we were to close, Trash told me that he didn’t want to sell his stock (which is where he said he was getting his half of the purchase). He sad he would pay me back when the market improved, SO I paid for the condo myself — 100%. I got the money for this purchase by refinancing my house in Salt Lake City Utah. I was fortunate to pay all cash for the condo.
Because of the anti-laundering laws in Mexico, they would not let me wire the money from my Bank of America account because According to Mexico laws, any account that has the words “living trust” or “trustee” in it is not considered a personal checking account. Here are the emails I received the day before closing.
So the end result of this email exchange is that the Mexico title company could not accept the money from my account. And we were closing the very next day — Feb. 25th 2022. Given that we needed a quick solution — I transferred the total amount required to close Trash’s Bank of America account and he wired it to the title company.
What I did not do, and the biggest mistake of my life thus far, is remove Trash’s name from the Private Contract. I didn’t think to do this because he said he would pay me back. Big Mistake.
Now Trash is trying to take the condo from me — saying it’s 50% his since his name is on the Private Contract and is demanding that I pay him 1/2 — which would be approximately $150,000. It’s a big mess that I am trying to work out here in Mexico right now. Lawyers in Mexico are not cheap…. but what else can I do?
He continues to tell people that it is HIS condo and that I am stealing it from him. He’s waving around a piece of paper that says he paid for the condo and I’m squatting. Nothing could be further from the truth.
I purchased the condo. I wanted a place for my parents to stay when they come out to visit me in the winter (they live in Pennsylvania). Outside of this, we would use it as a short term rental.
- I transferred all the closing money, a total of $255,395.24 from my Bank of America account to Trash’s Bank of America on Feb. 25, 2022.
- I also paid for the earnest money deposit of $5,000. So I paid a total of totaling $260,395.24
- I paid for any/all repairs or improvements. All charges were put on a credit card THAT I PAID FOR.
- I never saw a dime of the short term rental proceeds. As I understand it now, he has grossed over $16,000 between March — August 2022.
- I moved into the condo early September 2022 when I moved out of Trash’s house in MX. Our shared house that HE stayed in with his new girlfriend. Told me she was an “old friend” and that I had met her before (more on this later)..
So now I have two attorneys — one in the US and one in MX to fight for what is mine.
- never ever ever mix finances with anyone, let alone a narcissist. They believe what is yours is theirs.. and will fight for it.
- They will steal from you and not feel bad about it at all. They have zero integrity or any moral compass….
- They will never do the right thing — in their mind it is all about them and what is owed to them.
At the end of the day, I am spending a lot of money on lawyers and a lot of time fighting for what is rightfully mine. This lesson is the hardest lesson I’m learning and the hardest battle I’m fighting to date. So save yourself the headache and heartache— never ever mix finances with an ex, let alone a Narcissist.