Some people just aren’t very nice. What makes them this way? Why do they enjoy hurting other people?
I found this link on workplace bullying – http://www.academia.edu/161810/Potential_Legal_Protections_and_Liabilities_for_Workplace_Bullying
They define workplace bullying as:
“Workplace bullying can be defined as the “repeated, malicious, health-endangering mistreatment of one employee by one or more employees”
This results in significant harm to the mistreated employee:
“Bullying can inflict devastating harm on targeted employees. According to Dr. Gary Namie, severely bullied workers may experience conditions such as clinical depression, high blood pressure, cardiovascular disease, impaired immune systems, and even symptoms consistent with Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. Many of these individuals are faced with life-altering decisions about whether to stay in or leave a job.”
I have experienced everything listed here. I gained 10 pounds. I have significant digestive issues – I take 8 pills a day to help me with digestion, regularity, etc. My doctor has also given me several prescriptions to help me deal with my anxiety and depression, and my last blood test indicated high blood pressure and cholesterol levels, which has NEVER been an issue before now. His recommendation to me was to quit my job – that is was having a negative impact on my health.
I wanted to make things work. I spent most of the year trying to “turn her around”; have her see the real me (not her version of me), or at the very least just respect me and the work that I do. I gave up about a month ago – when a another colleague came into town, and she was nice, friendly, and kind to him. The words “thank-you” actually escaped her lips, to him of course, when the truth is, he put us 3 days behind schedule. It was this point that I lost it – I realized, that no matter what I did, how I did it, it was never going to be enough. She has just had it out for me since the beginning for whatever reason. It is the way it is and there is nothing I could possibly do to change her opinion of me.
These last 10 months have been so difficult, so challenging. I experienced something that I never thought could ever happen to me. I’m not a victim – I’m likable, professional, and easy to work with. I’m friendly, I’m kind, I’m a team player, I like people, I like to solve problems. It really never ever occurred to me that this would be the end to this professional chapter.
Yes, my management was/is aware of the situation. I did not contact HR (I believe that HR is there to protect the company, not me), and to be honest, I didn’t have time. I was truly working 15 hours a day, 7 days a week, for many many months.
This is it for me. I’ll write about my vacation and the amazing oppotunities and adventures I have ahead of me.
I linked your article to my story today. I mentioned HR as well but in my heart I knew they wouldn’t be of any assistance. I hope your situation is a lot better today. Life is too short to put up with that sort of crap! warm regards – Lorraine
Hello Paula, I might suggest your read some Shakespeare about the nature of bad people. Iago in Othello comes to my mind. He is just evil and that is that. No real explanation is given it just is. Don’t try to figure her motivations because that would require that her behavior was rational not based on a core charictor flaw.
Follow your doctors advise and get health and happy. Being in a tortus job can kill you or make your self so sick that you will end up in the hospital. Once you have removed yourself from the toxic environment you will be amazed how much happier and healthier you will feel in no time.
As to your resignation feeling. The regret is only natural. You invested a great deal but just like a broken relationship you can’t fix everything by yourself. You can only fix you.