Life Update.

I realize that it has been forever since I’ve posted… I’ve been busy working AND dating… yes that’s right, dating (I know, ME, Dating!!).  I’ll focus on the dating for this post.

I met a few gents while out with friends a few weeks ago.  They both took my number and called so I went out with them (I like to reward good behavior).. One of them has potential.  I really liked him, he likes me, but he is intermittent with his contact with me….  I respond to him when he reaches out, but don’t do the reaching out. Something I learned a while ago – if men want it, they will go for it…  I look forward to hearing from him again… maybe it will pick up, maybe it won’t…

In the meantime, I met a few men online, and one of them has a lot of potential.  An email from him turned into an email exchange, then turned to phone conversations, which lead to lunch on Saturday, then football watching on Sunday (49’s lost.. damn them), which lead to a few calls this week (I’m out-of-town in Idaho), and ultimately has ended up to be 3 future dates – 

  • this Saturday we are going to a charity concert at a winery
  • next Saturday my friend and I are going to see and dance to his band
  • and the following Saturday we are going to see the Blue Angels in SF

All I have to say is WOW, a guy who knows what he wants, and what he wants is me (Yeah me)!  And it doesn’t hurt that he is so darling (handsome and sweet)..   I’m going to call him Mr. Showtime (he’s done a bit of acting and is the lead singer in a local band)..

On the work side, work has been very busy but rewarding.  I’ve got a lot going on, but its all good stuff…  I’ve been traveling a lot, which is to be expected given the time of year and the accounts I have.  It will settle down before the Christmas holiday, which is when I will enjoy some me time.

Yes, I’m wearing a smile all the time.  Life is good.

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Lots Of Interesting People Dating Online.

I think I’m the last conservative girl on the planet.. well, me and my friends.

So, yes, I’m back to online dating to build my roster…  coming across all sorts of interesting folks…  Here’s a letter I received from Frank: 

“Hello from Frank.

Your profile was selected by OkCupid as someone I would like to see, and am dropping you this note to say hi.  My name is Frank and I am a professional white 50 year old married poly* man, and would enjoy chatting with you when you have the time. I also use the email xxxxxxx@yahoo.com . I travel on business in Asia, and like to visit and explore new places.

Hope you are enjoying your week, and it would be a pleasure talking some more with you!

Frank

* poly as in polyamorous: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Polyamory

Isn’t he sweet to think of me, thinking that I would be a good fit for his group/clan?  I know very sweet.  I’m thinking about it…   🙂 

Building The Roster Once Again.

There are a bajillion things I should be doing other than what I am doing… What I should be doing is:

  • out and about enjoying this amazing California sunshine
  • running a bunch of errands
  • doing my 2010 taxes
  • doing my expenses

Instead, I decided that The Roster is nearly empty once again and I need to fill it back up.  Empty why you may ask?

  • MM Lebanese guy – he is traveling extensively this month.. I was out-of-town last month (in Hotlanta)… I like  him, but its going to be a while before we have a chance to reconnect.  Not sure if the distance makes someone grow fonder. In my experience it does not – its been more of an out-of-site-out-of-mind thing.  I do hope he keeps in touch and calls when he returns, I would like to see him again.  But I’m not going to hold my breath….
  • Middle Seat Airplane guy – The beautiful black man I met on the airplane.  Yum!  Anyway, I’ll be in Boston later this month.. I sent him a witty email about my visit and asked him out. Yep, just went ahead and told him what I wanted – to see him again.  We shall see what he does.  If he doesn’t respond, I’m sad to say he will be off the roster. 
  • The Chef.  I had lunch with him.. He is definitely interested.  he finds me to be “one of a kind” – beautiful, kind, and sincere.  I know, he should be a keeper. But you know, he calls me EVERYDAY.  I feel stalked in a way… and maybe that’s because I don’t like him.  😦  I’ll have to do something about this one soon.

So what did I do to remedy this situation?  Took charge.  I’m a girl of action – I brought my online profiles back to life.  I checked out MillionaireMatch.com and returned a few emails, I reactivated my POF.com account, and I signed up for OkCupid.com.  I put the same profile and pictures on each site.  Here are my thoughts on these sites as of today.

MillionaireMatch.com

I love that there is a place to go and its about income.  Now I can’t get very granular in my search (only look for people in the State of CA for example), but you have to state your income and its visible..and verifiable.  I like this.  I do NOT want to date anyone that makes less than me.  So I really like this site for its honesty around finances.  I’ve got two suitors that I’m emailing with… One lives in Southern California, another lives here in Northern California.   I will definitely let you know if they turn into anything more substantial.

POF.com

Why why why did I reactive my profile?  I did a search for what I’m looking for, and it should not be at all shocking that most of the men that I saw months ago are the same ones that popped up.  And the guys that have reached out to me with winks, kisses, or whatever the flirting method on POF is… well, not that attractive or interesting.   There is one potential at this time – a man who I favorited actually wrote me and said he enjoyed my profile and would like to meet me.  A man who took initiative.  I like that.  So the ball is in his court as they say and I will let you know if anything happens.

OkCupid.com

I thought I would try this site out.  I like the interface, its easy and intuitive.  I had initially done a search online and found one guy that I thought was adorable and had a great profile.  So I registered,  completed my profile, added pictures, then favorited him.  THEN I read his profile.  And as cute and adorable he is, he’s allergic to cats.  I did send him an email letting him know I enjoyed his profile and a few other funny and witty comments.  But I do mention in my profile that I have cats, so my guess is that as charming as I am, I will not hear from him.  Bummer.  For now I’m going to just hang out on OKCupid and see what comes to me…

Oh, and one last note, the advice on the website is that women keep their dating pool open, date several men.. sorta like a roster…   I think OkCupid and I have the same philosophy on dating… 😉

GM Diet Day 7 – Fruit, Veggies, and Rice.

Day 7 has come and gone.. I’m SO GLAD that this diet is over with!  Again, not because the diet is a challenge food wise, but because the no drinking really hinders my social life.

The results of day 7… drum roll please…  4 ounces down.. for a 7 Day total weight loss of 3.5 pounds for the week.  Not great given that some have experienced 10-17 pounds of lost weight…  but I have officially lost all the weight I gained while working in Atlanta.

Day Date Day Morn Weight (lbs) Daily Loss/ Gain Total Loss # glasses of Water Daily Activity
1 29-Aug Mon. 126.1     8 10 min walk
10 min abs
2 30-Aug Tues. 124.1 (2.0) (2.0) 8 40 min run
10 min abs
3 31-Aug Wed. 123.6 (0.5) (2.5) 7 60 min golf
4 1-Sep Thurs. 123.6 0.0 (2.5) 9 30 min low impact work
5 2-Sep Fri. 123.7 0.1 (2.4) 10 60 min bar burn class
6 3-Sep Sat. 123.0 (0.7) (3.1) 6 lazy day
7 4-Sep Sun. 123.0 0.0 (3.1) 7 40 min run
10 min abs
FINAL 5-Sep Mon. 122.6 (0.4) (3.5)    

My thoughts on this diet:

  • It’s not really a diet but a cleanse.  I wouldn’t put much stock in losing weight on this plan UNLESS you plan to work out every day.  The days that I worked out are the days that I actually lost weight.
  • Eating Healthy is a lifestyle, not a diet.  I love fruits and veggies, so this diet was pretty close to my lifestyle, and if you too eat mostly fresh fruits and veggies, you are more than halfway there. 
  •  Carbs aren’t that hard to avoid.  I love only a few carbs – tortilla chips is about the only thing I really missed.  
  • You have to exercise.  As I mentioned a few times, the days I lost weight were the days I physically exerted myself….  to lose weight you have to exercise, period.  I love to workout, but it became clear to me during the week that I’m not exercising enough IF I want to lose weight. I exercise enough if I want to maintain.
  • Where does dairy fit into this plan?  I don’t like milk so I drink soy milk, but I’d love to know where cheese, cottage cheese, and yogurt fit in?  Are these things considered “bad” for you? Why are they not mentioned at all? 

A friend of mine mentioned that he lost 30 pounds on the 17 day diet… I think that will be my next diet attempt.  Like I stated before, I’d love to get down to 110… its my ideal weight – keeps enough meat on the bones but reduces the layer of fat that currently covers my muscles…..  🙂 .  So I would need to lose 13 pounds (I’m now at 123, I was 120 at the first of the year)…

So today is Monday, Labor Day, and I’m going out with friends to enjoy the sunshine and have a few afternoon cocktails.  I’m deliriously happy about it…

GM Diet Day 6 – Beef and Veggies.

Day 6 went.  Results of Day 6 is  no weight loss, no weight gain.  The highlight of the day was that I met friends for happy hour.. and it was soooo nice.  I loved being out and about.  Finally!  We sat outside, in the sun, enjoyed the summer late afternoon/early evening…. Its been the highlight of the week.

Day Date Day Morn Weight (lbs) Daily Loss/ Gain Total Loss # glasses of Water Daily Activity
1 29-Aug Mon. 126.1     8 10 min walk
10 min abs
2 30-Aug Tues. 124.1 (2.0) (2.0) 8 40 min run
10 min abs
3 31-Aug Wed. 123.6 (0.5) (2.5) 7 60 min golf
4 1-Sep Thurs. 123.6 0.0 (2.5) 9 30 min low impact work
5 2-Sep Fri. 123.7 0.1 (2.4) 10 60 min bar burn class
6 3-Sep Sat. 123.0 (0.7) (3.1) 6 lazy day
7 4-Sep Sun. 123.0 0.0 (3.1)    

I didn’t stick to the diet specifically, just did what I normally do.  I had a lot of fruit today – I don’t think that it is allowed, but its a hot summer day and that’s what I wanted.  I did eat some ground beef for dinner – ground beef with lots of tomatoes, onions, avocados, lettuce and Cholula sauce (no beans, cheese, sour cream, or chips).  As you can see, I didn’t work out either, so I’m sure that had an impact on my not losing any weight on Day 6.

The Final Day, Day 7, will prove interesting, I went for a run and worked in the yard for an hour.  I’ll let you know how it goes!

So Much In Common.

You know who I’m talking about… My Mr. Big.  Since I’ve been home and sober, my idle hands and mind have been working on all sorts of activities…  and my memories of My Mr. Big come rushing thru. Not that they aren’t with me every day, but now I’m very clear on what they are…  You will find them simple, probably trite, but they did and do mean the world to me:

  • Laundry.  We both only used 1/2 a sheet when drying our clothes.. I used to tear them, he cut them..  I finally ran out of My Mr. Big cut dryer sheets and had to cut my own.  I think of him every time I throw in a dryer sheet
  • Salads.  Of all my days on this diet, making salads for myself, not a single person, including myself, can make a salad like My Mr. Big.  I loved that he was so grown up and took the time and energy to make such great salads…and dinners (his Seared Scallops and Green Curry Chicken were better than anything I’ve ever eaten at any restaurant)
  • Exercise.  My Mr. Big was the biggest proponent of exercise.  He was into it as much as I was, often encouraged and inspired me to do better.
  • Cat Food cans.  I used to leave the cat food cans in the sink… he told me one day that it bothered him.  I now rinse the cans out and put them in recycling immediately.  What I cherish and remember is his honesty about it – It made me happy to know that I could make him happy (or at the very least not make him suffer). 
  • The Hairdryer. We both had an enthusiasm to dry all “our bits”..  every time I see or use the hairdryer, I think of him.
  • Dishes.  I hate to do dishes.  My Mr. Big was o.k. with this… I think he enjoyed doing the dishes because he knew how I disliked doing them.  He did them with a smile….  I just loved his generosity.
  • Naps. Once of life’s greatest pleasures.. and simply over the top  when you can share them with someone. My Mr. Big was a napper as well…
  • Passion.  I loved everything about him. I could orgasm just looking at him…  and it wasn’t just his looks, his gorgeous skin, but his deep kindness for people, his generosity towards his family, his intelligence…  The chemistry was just there and never waned the entire time we were together.

These are the everyday things that I adored and miss.  Tomorrow I’m going to work on a special project, which is reviving the citrus trees that are dying …. he used to take such good care of the plants.. he just knew how to care for them (like you know how to put on socks).  I was born without a green thumb, and all my attempts at keeping plants alive have been futile.  I feel I will fail at keeping these citrus trees from dying… I’m desperate to keep them alive just so that his memory of his kind care for them and gentle nature stays alive within me.   

The kindness and love, the support and blanket of love that I felt while with him still lives within me.  As much as I’m enjoying my life now, without responsibility (except for the cats, my nieces and great nieces, my financial commitments), I would give anything to have this feeling, this “partnership” again.  I think this is why I’ve not settled down.  I’ve had bad (the Ex husband), I’ve had GREAT (My Mr. Big), and the bar is high…  the guys on the roster have potential, but none have measured up as of yet (or chosen to participate).

This is why staying at home, with myself and no alcohol, is not preferred.  I run into the memory of what once was, what could have been, what I want for myself in the future.  Its so clear to me now….

GM Diet Day 5 – Beef and Tomatoes.

Day 5 went well.  Nothing out of the ordinary.  I ate all the tomatoes and only 1/4 lb of ground beef.  I drank a ton of water.  I felt full after eating the beef at lunch time, that all I ate in the afternoon and evening was tomatoes with basil and balsamic..  I had the fresh organic heirloom tomatoes from Farm Fresh To You and they were absolutely divine….  I don’t know if I can eat another tomato that doesn’t come from garden.

So after the beef and tomatoes day, I’ve lost 7 oz, for a total loss of 3.1 pounds.  I’ve officially lost my Atlanta weight. 

Day Date Day Morn Weight (lbs) Daily Loss/ Gain Total Loss # glasses of Water Daily Activity
1 29-Aug Mon. 126.1     8 10 min walk
10 min abs
2 30-Aug Tues. 124.1 (2.0) (2.0) 8 40 min run
10 min abs
3 31-Aug Wed. 123.6 (0.5) (2.5) 7 60 min golf
4 1-Sep Thurs. 123.6 0.0 (2.5) 9 30 min low impact work
5 2-Sep Fri. 123.7 0.1 (2.4) 10 60 min bar burn class
6 3-Sep Sat. 123.0 (0.7) (3.1)    

However, I had hoped to lose a bit more with this diet, I was looking to lose a total of 6 pounds – the 3 pounds I gained while working in Atlanta AND the 3 pounds that have crept on during the year.. that would put me down to 120 – the weight I rang in the New Year at.  Ideally I’d love to be at 110.. which I would consider my ideal weight given my height and bone structure.  Maybe that will be my 2012 New Years Resolution…

I think the secret is eating healthy AND working out.  The days I had “strenuous” workouts are the days that I lost the most weight.  I love to run and I love the classes at the gym… so I will continue to eat healthy and focus on working out.  What I do not plan on doing is giving up my social life for a diet any longer.  I’m going to stick to the ‘lots of fruits and veggies no carb diet’, but not waste away my weekend by avoiding activities with friends so that I don’t drink.