End of the Sparkley.

So, today, I finally did it – I sold my engagement ring.  Its been on the back of my mind for months (honestly more like a year and a half now, ever since the seperation… “what the hell do with this thing now?”).

Today, I went to a jewelry store and just sold it.  I felt a huge sigh of relief.  More than I expected to feel.  Honestly, I’m so relieved to be done with this part of my life.  Selling the ring seemed more important since I’ve changed my name.  I really just want to be done with the past, with the part of my life that was unhappy; unfullfilled…  Now, single with two cats, i’m so much more content and happy with my life.  I never thought I would be single at 38 ….   single with two cats none-the-less…  but I am happy, how lucky am I to be 38 and truly happy?!?!?

Anyway, the fancy pants diamond ring is gone…. and honestly, I couldn’t be happier.  Materials things cannot and do not make me happy…  I’d be happy with a rented trailer by the sea, or better yet, a lavendar farm in northern/central California!!

Good-bye sparkely diamond, I will not miss you.

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Home Is Where The Heart Is.

Home is where the heart is.  Yes,  a title stolen from  a movie, but its the truth. 

I was having a conversation with a friend tonight and it just hit me – all the shisa that has ‘happened’ to me this year is so inconsequential, the most important thing that has happened to me IS recognizing how lucky I am for having phenominal people around me.   Honestly, I just realized that nothing else matters but my friends and my furry kids.  My best friends who have supported me thru thick and thin, good and bad times.. ….  my furry kids who have loved me, unconditionally, thru 3 moves….

Yes, I’m divorced, newly single (or whatever people call it these days)… Yes, I had a great life, it all looked good from the outside.  And I wanted people to believe it was good.  But as much as I want to call the ex a coward, to some degree, I was myself.  He was ultimately the person that ended it thru infidelity, but we all know by now this was a symptom of a bad relationship.

Anyway, as I was chatting with my friend, It really hit me as to what was important to me… and its my best friends…. its spending time (no matter where or when) with friends; its a few moments with a best friend who is leaving town for while, its talking with my niece whom I love like my own……..  its talking/connecting with friends.  And as much as I love material things (who doesn’t love new shoes!!), I’ve realized that none of my ‘stuff’ is really that important;  all I really care about is about loving, living, talking, and taking care of the folks I adore. 

I’ve been some what a recluse lately (my friends would say its been years).  But I’ve been recovering, and now, very content with the life I’ve created.   But I have to say, I think to some degree I’ve been sub-consciously just dealing with making a new life for myself… now though, as of tonight, its a concsious choice – I love my friends, they have been very very very very good to me. 

I’m lucky and I know it.  This is a great place to be.

Worst Movie Ever.

I know, most folks would suggest that any “Dawn of the Dead” movies should be at the top of the list. But I’ve found something worst than one of these movies:  “Marley and Me”.  Stupidest movie ever. So fake, rediculai, and the worst acting I’ve ever seen in a very long time (shame on you Jennifer Anniston and Owen Wilson). 

I love animals, have a furry loved one that died a few years back… but this move is so fake, so staged, so stupid.. If I run across someone who liked it, I will definitelly think less of them (a lot less…).  God forbid a customer of mine actually likes this movie, I would have to tell them how silly they were…  tell them about the error of their ways…

So, the movie.  Its about a poor bastard (Owen) who has to support a wife and 3 kids… who thru their lives loved a dumb-ass dog who mis-behaves, and finally, finally, is put down because of old age (and truth be known, if any kid acted the way this stupid dog behaved, I would petition to have the damn thing put to sleep ASAP.. who wouldn’t????).. it IS NOT cute when a kid mis-behaves, why is it cute when a furry animal does?? SO NOT!!).. 

O.k.   so, I love my cats like my children, AND I’ve also put a cat to sleep, my babe, my child. It has taken me forever to recover (if i’m really “recovered”..).  I have friends who love their furry beasts like children. My opinion isn’t about these folks, these feelings. Its about the fake, commercial way that this movie plays on these emotions.. and the fact that two stupid stars allowed this to be shamelessly displayed thru one of their movies.  This movie is nothing more than a “money maker” (and I’m not talking about a good looking backside)… The movie has no substance, no backing.. and is a complete waste of time.